As we take in the images of the holidays, we see festive scenes and pictures of joy, gifts, and people laughing and enjoying one another. Yet, your story and experience during the holiday season may be quite different. Loss through death, divorce, separation, or estrangement of a loved one can pull up painful memories and emotional distress that make this time of season difficult to get through. Any number of things can trigger painful memories. Seeing a mother and daughter just walking through a store holding hands can trigger memories that were once joyful and are now replaced with feelings of emptiness and loneliness. These negative emotions can pull up anger, sadness, resentment, and cause you to isolate and move towards depression. Here are four ways to guard against getting into that negative emotion cycle.

1. Identify what you are feeling, what is triggering it and what negative emotions are presenting in your life. In other words, own your feelings, do not deny them. Sometimes owning our feelings requires us to look at things that are inside of us that we do not want to see.
2. Invite a safe person into your life to talk with you about these feelings, process them, and grieve them. Grieving is different for every person. It may involve tears, remembering the person by cooking their favorite food, telling a story about them, or engaging in an activity that they enjoyed and helped you to make a fond memory of them. If it is too painful, see a professional person who can help you work through it.
3. Do not isolate. Reach out to others who are safe and who have your best interest in mind. God made us for relationships, not isolation. Reach out to people who can build you up and encourage you.
4. Remember that God can restore your life. He is in the restoration business. Trust and invite Him to do it! He wants to restore! Never give up on His desire to restore you back to emotional health around loss and grief. It may not be in the timing that you would expect, but when it does come, it can bring tremendous healing, growth and change to your life for the better.

Isaiah 40: 31 but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar
on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not be faint.